Parashat Chayei Sarah – A Shabbat Dinner Table discussion

This week many in our congregation will be gathering at each other’s homes for Shabbat dinner. Part of this “Got Shabbat” dinner experience is a discussion of the Torah portion around the table. I encourage anyone, whether you are participating in our formal program or are simply gathering with your own family for Shabbat dinner tonight, to print out the following summary of the Torah portion, commentary and discussion questions. Take some time, perhaps between dinner and dessert, to have an informal discussion of these questions or your own!

Shabbat Shalom,
Rabbi Goldenberg
Parashat Chayei Sarah: Genesis 23:1-25:18

SUMMARY:
In this week’s Torah portion, Chayei Sarah, we have two deaths, with a wedding in the middle. Sarah, Abraham’s wife, dies and Abraham, now alone, seeks to insure that the next generation will continue the Jewish traditions which he and Sarah have established. To that end Abraham sends his servant Eliezer to find a wife for his son Isaac from among his kin. Eliezer travels to the land of Abraham’s birth and returns with Rebecca, kin to Abraham and considered an appropriate wife. At the close of this portion, Abraham dies. We read: And Abraham breathed his last, dying at a good ripe age, old and contented; and he was gathered to his kin. His sons Isaac and Ishmael buried him in the cave of Machpelah…” (Genesis 25:8-9)
FOCUS:
This is the first time that we see the half-brothers Isaac and Ishmael working together. Theirs has not been an easy relationship. Ishmael, the older son, was born to Abraham and Sarah’s servant Hagar. Sarah had asked Abraham to have a child through Hagar, as Sarah was initially unable to get pregnant. In last week’s Torah portion, Isaac is miraculously born to Abaraham and Sarah in their old age. Sarah then banishes Ishmael and his mother Hagar from their home, worried that the covenantal promises between God and Abraham would not get passed down to her son Isaac.
At the end of this week’s Torah portion we see Isaac and Ishmael coming together to bury their father. Isaac then becomes the progenitor of the Jewish people and Ishmael has that same status among the Muslim community.
COMMENTARY:
In the following midrash (a story told by the rabbis as a comment on a story from Torah) we read about a very different kind of brotherly relationship.
The Story of Two Brothers
Once long ago there were two brothers who shared a large field. The brothers grew wheat together in this field and shared equally in the harvest. Each brother had his own house. The older brother was married and had children. The younger brother lived alone.
One night during the harvest the older brother could not sleep. He was worrying about his younger brother. The older brother thought to himself, My younger brother is all alone and I have a wife and children. When I am old my children will take care of me. I must give some of my wheat to my brother so he may save for his old age.
On that same night, the younger brother tossed and turned in his bed worrying about his older brother. He thought to himself, My older brother has a family to feed and I only need to feed myself. I must give some of my wheat to my brother.
Quietly, and in secret, each brother loaded his arms with wheat and carried it to his brother’s storage area. The brothers did this for three nights. On the following mornings when the brothers would check their piles of wheat they remained the same size. Each wondered, How could this be? I know I am putting more wheat in my brother’s pile.
On the fourth night when the moon was full each brother again rose up. Each filled his arms with wheat and made his way to his brother’s storage area. Then, suddenly by the light of the moon the two brothers met in the middle of the field. Each realized what the other had been doing. They put down their armfuls of wheat and hugged each other.
Jewish tradition tells us that it was on this spot where the two brothers met that the Bet Ha-mikdash, The Temple in Jerusalem, was built.
QUESTIONS TO EXPLORE
The Torah text doesn’t tell us what Isaac and Ishmael’s relationship was like after Ishmael was banished and before they came together to bury their father.
Imagine what you think their relationship was like:
Had they stayed in touch, or was this the first time they had seen each other since childhood?
What do you think caused Isaac and Ishmael to come together to bury their father?
How do you think the brothers felt when they saw each other? Do you think they were surprised to see each other?
Can you imagine what the scene was like at the burial? Did they talk to each other? Embrace?
Why do you think the Torah tells this story of two brothers who were separated from each other and then came together to bury their father? What lesson might it be teaching us?
Do you see any parallels between this story and your own relationships with siblings or other family members?
What lesson do you think the “Story of the Two Brothers” teaches us? How is this story similar to or different from the story of Isaac and Ishmael?